I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
