before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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