i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Randomize
