Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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