Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I just blew my weed a kiss
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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