I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize