yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
