hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize