So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize