Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize