Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
