oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
