do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
birth control should be required to get into college
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize