at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
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3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.