i just wanna soil my oats bro
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
