Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
