dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
