we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
