i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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