when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I'm getting married
To pizza
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Randomize
