WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
