did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
