I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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