just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
he was CRYING into my vagina
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Randomize
