Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
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Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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