Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
