We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
