So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
