Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
