anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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