Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
