Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(916): View more from California

You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..

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(813): View more from Florida

They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.

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(807): View more from Ontario

I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(904): View more from Florida

HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.

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(406): View more from Montana

You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate

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(719): View more from Colorado

Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?

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(757): View more from Virginia

IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP

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