She just used a chaser for red wine.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Randomize
