I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize