i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
