Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize