with your own penis?
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
