MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
