I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
