i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
