Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
