I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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