had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
