is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
