sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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