Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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