next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
