I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
