Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize
