He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
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Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
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He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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