Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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